4th Neurologist Assessment - Dec 2007 - How did it go?

In short, it's ok. will elaborate later.

but the Dr sure always says things to bring me down the rest of the day.

God's prompting!

and yes His prompting is so so strong that I must post here and remind myself....
I got that prompting at the last healing mass and now as I am seated in front of the PC too....telling me even to print out a part of this blog which shares the good news to be put on transparency on the overhead projector so that people could read if we are not clear enough as we speak.

At the last healing mass in St Michael's 15th Dec, when testimonies were being called for, I was telling myself as I was seated at my bench that I wanna go out and proclaim His name and give all glory to Him the next healing mass! I told the Lord that in 2 days' time, Jeremiah will have a test, the Micturating Cistogram or MCU in short to check the functionality of his bladder and if there was any reflux to the kidneys. I asked the Lord to heal Jeremiah, to protect Jeremiah kidneys, to heal his neurogenic bladder, restore the nerves that had been affected in the open neural tube defect. I then told the Lord, Lord, I wanna be out there in the next healing mass sharing in the wonderful love and blessings that He has bestowed upon Jeremiah and us his family.

Jeremiah was born with Spina Bifida, in other words, an open neural tube defect and this affects him hips down, of which one of the problems are a neurogenic bladder which is Drs say he can't empty his bladder due to some nerve that got damaged or never ever developed. Thus, we have to go for such tests regularly to assess progress to ensure the kidneys aren't affected.

And the next healing mass at St Michael's you shall see us proclaim His name! otherwise knock us hard on our heads! Maybe I should get Tim to read this or to do the testimony as I always get too emotional. TIM DEAR! ARE YOU READING????

The next healing mass
19th January 2007
3rd Sat Mass with Healing Service
Church of St Michael
Rosary session 6.45pm
Praise & Worship 7.30pm
Mass with healing session 8.00pm

See u there! God bless!

Neurologist Assessment - Dec 2007

Gosh! How time flies!

It's been 3 months since little Jerry was last assessed by the neurologist at KKH and he's due for his appointment again on the 27th Dec at 1150am clinic P KKH.

Please pray that the neurologist is guided by God in her assessment and that Jerry grows up with healthy wonderful development! AMEN!

MERRY BLESSED CHRISTMAS!!!!

to one and all!

and let's celebrate keeping in mind it's Jesus birthday!
Thank you Father in heaven for sending us your son, Jesus.

Lord at this Christmas time I come to you
I need to talk to you today
I need to thank you that you came to Earth
and that you came in such a special way
You came to save a lost and lonely world
No other reason for your birth
and yet so often we forget you on this day
Lord there's just one thing
I really need to say
I want to give you a special gift
to say I love you by what I do
I want this Christmas to be different from the rest
I want to give myself to you

Here's something very special for the more chinese people... well even for me... who is not so into chinese also appreciate this so I am sure you will all appreciate this.... esp when the kids sing this.... just awesome!
it's all about

THE GIFT

一件礼物

1。有一件礼物，你收到没有，
眼睛看不到，你心会知道，
这一件礼物，心门外等候，
是为了你准备，别人不能收。

副歌：生命有限，时光也会走，
如果你不珍惜，机会难留，
礼物虽然好，如果你不要，
你怎么能够得到，
怎么能得到？

2。亲爱的朋友，你是否想到，
马槽的婴孩，是为你而来，
亲爱的朋友，你是否了解，
最好的礼物是人子主耶稣。

Jere's 17 and a half months

today... yeah exactly

and let's look at what our little champ can do!

First, Let's look at his spiritual milestones.

1.The little one joins his hands when you say "Jere, let's say grace" before our meals.

2. At the cue of "In the name of the father,....." he tries to make the sign of the cross. *dot dot dot here dot dot dot there with his little fingers but just dot all the wrong places at the wrong time!* haha

3. When we pray, he ends it with "Amen!"

4. He tries to sing the hymns that you are singing with his own renditions and lifts up his hands in praise and worship.

then he has started to call.... not in any order of preference and some of which he has been calling for the longest time

1. Ma meh (that's me!)
2. Dar Dar (that's his daddy!)
3. Kor Kor
4. Tita (tagalog for aunty that's what he calls our helpers)
5. Grandma
6. Ah Kong
7. Ah Ta (means paternal grandpa in hakka)
8. Ah Nei (means paternal grandma in hakka)
9. Papa (that's what he calls my dear Brother-in-law Jason actually. Jerry just decides to call him Papa!)
10. Mama (that what he calls my dear sis... his variation of Yee Ma)
11. Porpor (all the aunties downstairs at the void deck)
12. Uncle
13. Auntie
14. Meimei
15. Didi
16. Baby

Jeremiah and drawers

I heard the drawer opening and closing opening and closing in the room then i went towards the room and as I caught sight of the room from the door, there the little rascal, yes, our dear little Jeremiah was opening and closing the drawer of the bedside table.

I put my arms on my hips and in an almost scolding tone went "Who's playing with the drawers?"

Our dear friend quickly back off from the drawers and shook his head saying "NO..... NO....." *certainly not me kinda face*

It was such a sight.... my seventeen month old baby is growing up to be a BIG BOY :)

not that I'm happy my baby is playing with drawers.... but my baby is going the way the usual baby does :) inquisitive... cause and effect.... it opens? it close! haha

How did the MCU go?

We reached KKH at about 1615hr, quickly registered and was sent along to wait outside the procedure room. A nurse came out and told me to change Jere into the gown. I changed him and he was still quite unsuspecting of what was going on. In his gown, he continued to play outside the waiting area.

Then someone from the room came out and called for Jeremiah. I went into the room with him. The doctor then briefly explained to me what the procedure about.... how they were gonna insert a catheter in and put in some contrast solution and then see how the bladder reacts and if there was any reflux. Then they told me I had to leave the room while they inserted the catheter and come in only when they were done.

I left the room and Jere was almost gonna cry as he kinda suspect now something was quite amiss. I whispered into his ear that Jesus loves Jeremiah and He will heal Jeremiah and Jere responded with an "AMEN" which kinda amazed the people in the room too.

Waiting outside the room, I could hear Jere's loud wailing. Poor baby. However, each time i heard his cries, I told myself. He feels. He senses the pain otherwise why would he wail?

I prayed for strength and I thought of Mother Mary and Jesus. Mother Mary is just so so amazing and faithful. She submitted to the will of God seeing her only son Jesus being tortured, scourged and crucified when He had done no wrong. Her heart must have bled so much. What's this little cross that Jeremiah's carrying? What's this little pain I feel?

Then the door opened and the medical staff asked me to go in.

There I saw little Jerry strapped down to the "space craft". I quickly held his hands and assured him mummy is there with him. His cries were uncontrollable. Nothing seemed to comfort him. It was certainly scary to be strapped to that darn thing with something else coming close down almost on your face and being strapped totally with no defence at all wondering the thing on top would it ever slam down on your face is definitely what I felt for little Jerry. It's almost like Indiana Jones and the temple of doom. Poor baby.

I talked and talked to little Jerry with tears streaming down my own face singing all the hymns familiar to him. From Jesus saves to Jesus loves you to Song of a Young Prophet to It's a great day to praise the Lord to What a friend we have in Jesus.... Slowly but surely God's peace transcended all understanding. The peace guarded our hearts and minds.

My peace I give unto you
It's a peace that the world cannot give
It's a peace that the world cannot understand
Peace to know, peace to live,
My peace I give unto you.

My tears dried up and I just kept singing....

What seemed almost like eternity soon ended and the Dr said "ok, you can carry him now"

I quickly got him out of "the craft". Jerry cried till his whole head was wet and his face was full of his tears and mucous from the nose. As they invited me out, I couldn't help but turn around and asked the Dr how did the thing look.

Normally, the Dr or radiologist won't want to comment and would say "your specialist would explain to you"
But the Dr said, "Good. No reflux! He can empty his bladder a little on his own. Looks like he will recover his condition in time but till then you gotta keep monitoring and treatment."
I couldn't help but say out loud "Thank you Lord! Praise the Lord!". I was just a little short of shouting it out.

Jerry was so so sweet. When I told him to be nice and say bye bye before leaving, he took out the pacifier that he was sucking for comfort and muttered his "bubbye" waving at all in the room.

I know Jeremiah was given to me for a purpose. God will raise up and set free is the meaning of Jeremiah and God will definitely do that for my little Jerry. Jeremiah will be exalted of the Lord. Jeremiah is my little brave warrior and the battle is the Lord's. Our God will reign VICTORIOUS!

Yes Jeremiah will be healed. He will recover his condition in time. Jeremiah will be restored and will be raised up and be set free! In Jesus name we pray. AMEN AMEN AMEN! ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA! ALLELUIA!

and with this I shall end this post with a song of thanksgiving.

Thank You Lord!
I come before you today
And there's just one thing that I want to say
Thank you lord
Thank you lord
For all you've given to me
For all the blessings that I cannot see
Thank you lord
Thank you lord

**With a grateful heart
With a song of praise
With an outstretch arm
I will bless your name
Thank you lord
I just wanna thank you lord
Thank you lord
I just wanna thank you lord
Thank you lord

For all you've done in my life
You took my darkness and gave me your light
Thank you lord
Thank you lord
You took my sin and my shame
You took my sickness and healed all my pain
Thank you lord
Thank you lord

Healing Mass

Tomorrow at Church of St Michael's

Healing mass at
15th December 2007
3rd Sat Mass with Healing Service
Church of St Michael
Rosary session 6.45pm
Praise & Worship 7.30pm
Mass with healing session 8.00pm

See u there! God bless!

Micturating Cystogram (MCU in short)

Scheduled on the 17th December 2007 1600hr at KKH Diagnostic Imaging Department

We missed the last one in 14th Aug coz Jere was having a flu then.

Just in case you are wondering again what's MCU, it's all about passing a fine tube through the urethra (the hole thru which urine is passed) with a special solution running slowly thru the fine tube into the bladder. X rays films are taken by the radiologist during and after the procedure. This is to assess the progress as Jere was diagnosed with neurogenic bladder at birth.

I know it's not gonna be as easy as it sounds as Jere will be strapped down in this weird "space craft" looking thing on top of inserting a tube through "there" and this would definitly call up any fear in anyone. Who likes to be restrained and it certainly feels claustrophobic to be strapped onto that kinda craft?

Please pray that God be with Jeremiah and take away all the discomfort and fear in him and all the test shows good results. Please also pray for strength in me that I may be able to be strong throughout the procedure. Amen.

Sombre Saturday

It was the 17th Nov and I went down to the Club Rainbow family centre at Upper Cross Street for a briefing. They were organising a cruise come December for their Rainbow children and their families.

Club Rainbow (Singapore) is a registered charity committed to helping children suffering from a range of chronic and life-threatening illnesses and Jeremiah was registered as a rainbow child at birth due to his spina bifida condition.

This is the first time we are joining in their activities as they missed us for over a year in their events as they got our mailing address wrong. Then while seeing our neurologist at kkh, she told us to call the centre and we happened to also bump into another volunteer at our church of Christ the King. So we called and we were invited to join them on a cruise.

Anyhow, I found my way to the centre that Saturday and saw a huge crowd hanging outside the place only to realise that everyone was queueing to register for the cruise. While waiting for my turn, I chatted with another mother who shared that two of her children are rainbow children, one with muscular dystrophy and another with some heart problem. She's a strong mum, I must say. She spoke so positively and proudly of her children all and proudly showed their pictures on her mobile to me.

Then we went into the centre and the briefing started proper. We were advised to leave our children at home due to space constraints but nevertheless, some children were there which I believe their main caregiver were the parents themselves. Seeing some of them was already so depressing and I know I am gonna see worst and more in the cruise itself. I think this cruise is gonna open up the world of our eldest son Nat who is as normal as can be and thinks the world belongs to him and things should always be how it should be and will always be how it should be. A child who has taken life so much for granted coz things have always fallen nicely in place for him.

After the briefing, as Tim and I were making our way home, we met our neighbour's children playing downstairs with their helpers. They were two little gals from the fifth floor of the same block we stay. The younger of the two was born the same year as Jere but about 3 months later than Jere. I remember her as a children's day child. She was toddling while her helper held her hands. She was so cute and adorable! Thank God for her mum. Her mum was one brave lady that persisted to carry her throughout the pregnancy going against her whole family as she went for repeated tests that confirm she was carrying a down child. But this little gal, is perfectly normal when born. Thank you Lord that you gave wisdom and courage to this mum and made this wonderful miracle happen to this little gal. I played briefly with her and we went on our way. As we entered the lift to go up, Tim and I was silent. Then I broke the silence saying....
"I can't help feeling really sad seeing the little gal who is younger than Jere already walking and our baby is still crawling"
Tim said "me too!" quietly but clearly.

Lord, please make our Jeremiah walk. Please straighten and strengthen his feet that he can get up and walk. Lord, make this child Jeremiah walk like any other child would. Restore Jeremiah to perfect health. This we ask in Jesus name! AMEN

Jeremiah's first flight!

God sure has blessed Jeremiah abundantly!

Daddy Tim was sent to Bangkok for work on the 3oth Oct to 4th Nov and dear daddy thought he like to bring his dear wifey and two boys for a break so using the miles he clocked flying for work, he redeemed tickets for all of us to tag along! So off we went!



At the Changi Airport as we were walking towards the gate, we thought we take a pic as our first trip out as a family of 4!



All belted down to Mama and ready to fly. Jere's first flight on SQ979 to Bangkok! Thank you daddy!



A closer look at the cool dude all set to go!
Bangkok, here Jere comes!

Holidays???

A break! The last time we went for a break was our Bali trip back when Jere was still in the tum tum of mama.

Big bro Nat had been nagging us for a holiday but due to financial and the medical worries of Jere, we told him sorry. Daddy Tim also had been wanting a break for the longest time as he was all stressed out by family and work but I said NO too. I told them, well if they prayed hard enough, maybe it would happen.

God heard them :)

I guess they must have been praying so really hard especially Nat that we are having holidays in all modes.

What holidays God have granted us.....

A Bangkok and Pattaya trip by plane in Oct/Nov

and what more He has in store for us.....

A night stay at Conrad Singapore in Nov

A drive up to Malaysia French themed resort in Nov

A cruise on Star Virgo with Club Rainbow! in Dec

A solution to the helper crisis

I had been ranting about the whole darn thing for so long and losing sleep and getting stressed.......... and guess it's coming to an end.

Yes. Praise God! He has found a new helper for us.....*drumroll* please! MARY JANE!

No she's not the spidy man's gal but well, we'll see how things go. Jere seems to adapt to her quite well. She's been with us since Monday night. That means about 3 days and other than the fact that she dropped Nat's piano book on the way to piano lesson, things are going smooth. Thank you Lord. Ok, I don't really think she is to be blamed but our dear trainer cum manager Ros (old helper) did not give her any bag to put the books and ended up they dropped it on the way without realising. This got me a little mad at that moment... but looking back, thank God they did not tell me they dropped something more important. Nat on the other hand is still trying to size her up.

I pray that she will be the one for us. She studied midwifery before and showed no fear or apprehension when I told her of Jeremiah's condition. She even knew the medical term to "water in the head" saying "hydrocephalus" when I told it to her. Apparently she loves reading and has gained this knowledge through her own reading. She also was not put off at all when I told her she had to massage Jere's anus so he can poo poo out every morning and evening. So our journey with our new help begins.

Do pray with us that she would be a good fit for our family and take good care of the children, our wonderful blessings from God.

Adios Ros!

Jere,
This is your Tita Ros that took care of you from the time you were 1 month old till I guess 16 months?
This is one of the pictures taken when she's reading the G! Magazine from our Church of Christ the King and you just like to flip whatever she is reading. Cheeky you.
Once her documents is done and cleared, she'll be off to get married and take care of her 11 year old daughter.

We wish her happiness and all the best.

We pray that we will get a new Tita that will love you just as much, if not even more :) Lord, guide us and send us your angel :)

Love, Mummy

HEALING

*okie if you like to skip the story and go straight to the mass details, please scroll down*

"I NEED HEALING!I NEED HEALING MASS!"
shouts the helper even after all the saga she presented me.

At the carpark this morning as she was carrying Jerry to send us off, the usual morning ritual, she said,
"I NEED HEALING!I NEED HEALING MASS!"
I could sense she is very disturbed by the whole matter of going back and all but she chose it even after I told her to think carefully about the whole thing.

Had a talk with her last night and she did not realise what are the consequences of the premature termination of contract on her side. She thought it was as easy as
"I wanna go home" and she gets her air ticket and gets flown right back.
so what's the consequences:

1. Serve one month or till I find a replacement, whichever is sooner.
2. Bear her own costs of air ticket
3. Bear the costs of the documentation of the next new helper for employer since she's only 8 mths into contract. This is to protect the employer and deter these helpers from "happy happy break contract" attitude.

When I told her all of the above, she kinda freaked out and told me,
"M'am, why don't you do me a favour and send me back as home leave? Pity me."
It's kinda sad, she asks me to pity her and who will pity me? If I send her back on homeleave means I cannot apply for another helper until I confirmed after her homeleave that she did not return. Then it will take me another 2-3 weeks to get a new helper. this means more than a month of no help.

After she told me all these, all the more I felt she should pay herself all the consequences.
Six months ago, she told me she needed to go back for her daughter's graduation and settle her husband's affair. Gave us a date to stick by coz it's the daughter's graduation and we gave in.
Six months later, she says "I need to go back and get married" and again gives us a date.
That aside, inconvenience, yes so much inconvenience is caused (just too bad for employer, well, in this case, that's our family)

Okie, am I being a little too unforgiving? Sometimes, I think I am too nice and being taken for a ride but sometimes I think I am a little too unforgiving. I can't deny the frustration, the disappointment and anger in me. Yes, I need the healing too.

So you see, besides the people that need the physical healing, that is Jeremiah in this case, all of us need some kind of healing. Something heavy that we throw upon ourselves.

and actually, holding the child Jeremiah himself indeed is very healing :)

Healing mass at
20th October 2007
3rd Sat Mass with Healing Service
Church of St Michael
Rosary session 6.45pm
Praise & Worship 7.30pm
Mass with healing session 8.00pm

See u there! God bless!

The search for a new helper begins....

Lord be with us as we search for someone to help take care of our family and home while Tim and I work. Lead us to the right help who loves you Lord and see Nathaniel and Jeremiah as blessings from you Lord and love them too.

Lord, I know you have someone out there who is also looking for us
Someone who loves you Lord
Someone with a BIG HEART!

Lord, I know when you close one door, you will open another for us for you have plans for us. Plans to prosper not to destroy.

Even with all the budgets, long-term plannng and cautious steps, things may not happen the way we like them to be but Lord, you can set it aright and we trust that you will set them all aright

Thank you Lord for the faith you've increased in us day by day. Thank you for putting Jeremiah into my life for I know it is through Jeremiah that my faith increased leaps and bounds. Thank you Lord for making us instruments of Your love.

Today, I am at peace for I know by staying close to you Lord, nothing is impossible.

So Lord, with you beside us, we'll never give up for we can do all things through God who strenghthens me (Phil 4:13)

Helper sacked us?

My mind is in a whirl.

The helper dropped the bomb last night.
She gave us the sack.
Says she needs to be out of here by November.
Just took her salary on Sunday and 3 days later says she wanna go home.
And so I thought she loved and cared for Jere a lot....
But she just told us, she wanna go home last night to get married. She found a swiss boyfriend and it's her opportunity.
6 months ago, just in April, she told me she had to go home to settle her stuff as her husband is having an affair and I let her go.
Thought it was settled.
6 months later, now she tells me she found a new boyfriend and wanna get married.
What's with these people?
I hardly slept a wink.
Worried. Yes I am.
Where do I go from here?

If any of you reading got a good solution for us, please drop us a note.

Lord, I surrender this to you for I know you have plans for us. Plans to prosper not to destroy. Lord, please take over me.

Mummy, When will Jerry grow up?

pop quiz by Nat this morning as we were sending him to school

Nat: Mummy, When will Jerry grow up?
Me: What you mean grow up?
Nat: Stand, walk and run with me.
Me: Jerry is a special baby. By right, baby this age should be able to stand and walk already. But Jerry is born with a defect
Nat: What is a defect?
Me: Defect means something was not quite right about him. His spine which is the bone behind here (pointing to my spine) was outside when he was born. That was why we had to send him for operation. So his hips down is affected and this makes him have not as much strength to stand or walk. Only God can help. So you gotta pray really hard for this to happen.

Nat listening intently all the while then butted in to say....

Nat: Pray really hard?
Me: Yeah. Pray really hard.

There was a long silence.
My heart was in pieces. On one hand,I felt sad that Jerry could not get on his feet and walk yet. On the other hand, I also felt really sad for Nat who had always wanted a younger sibling to play with him. To run with him. To kick a ball with him. To play catching with him.

Won't you all just pray as hard together with Nat for his little brother to stand up, walk, run and play with him?

Yes, Jerry WILL walk.
not just walk.
Jerry will run, hop, skip and jump. Most of all, Jerry will dance for the Lord and be a testimony of His wonderful love for us.

Jerry is a miracle kid and will carry on to be!

Now, even the kid knows there's nothing my God cannot do!

3rd Neurologist Assessment - Sept 2007 - How did it go?

Dr J pointed to the head and the hands and said "looks ok"
Mummy said "ok? you mean his cognitive all ok?"
Dr J "well for now, we can't really tell till he gets older"
Mummy say "Praise the Lord! He is ok and will be ok. Amen"
Dr J "You gotta work hard there" pointing to the legs and hips down
Mummy "l know and I will"
Dr J "okie... then i will see you in 4 months' time"
Mummy "4? can we make it 3?"
it always sounds like i am in the market bargaining for a fish when it comes to drs appointment at the public hospital coz apparently there's a long q.
Dr J "Okie... if that's what you want... i am only seeing him to make sure he's well"
Mummy "thanks, but of coz!"

That's about it :)
i think sometimes the drs probably think mummy is crazy.
but mummy believes that with God, faith and love, what else can we not achieve when we stay close to God :)
Amen!

3rd Neurologist Assessment - Sept 2007

Hospital appointment tomorrow Jere?

Here's how he looked :P


Nah.... just kidding, this sure wasn't his expression when you tell him he got an appointment with the doc! This pic was taken recently when we were out for dinner :)jus thot a little pic of the angel could cheer us all abit :)

Time flies! and it's 3 months and we gonna see the neurologist again tomorrow.

Frankly, my heart weighs tons everytime i gotta bring the little one to the hospital.

I pray one day, i can say we don't need to step into the hospital anymore coz he's DISCHARGED! TOTALLY WELL AND COMPLETELY HEALED! and I know the LORD GOD is working on this as we pray about it everyday.

Do keep little Jeremiah in your prayers for complete healing for I look forward to the day where i can glorify His name and say Jeremiah is totally healed and well. AMEN!

3rd sat Healing Mass

People say TGIF and yes not jus that!
it's 3rd Friday and tomorrow's 3rd saturday and what's so special about that???
We have our monthly appointment!

Hear Ye!

Healing mass at
15th September 2007
3rd Sat Mass with Healing Service
Church of St Michael
Rosary session 6.45pm
Praise & Worship 7.30pm
Mass with healing session 8.00pm

See u there! God bless!

Our little Hero standing!

So... after our dear helper told me about little Jere's attempts to stand, i always try to standby the camera... and

TA.... da.... finally....

Yeah! I'm sure lotsa you will be thrilled to see this!
And Oh No! the boy's not camera shy... it's coz he's not dressed up nicely la :P... when he is at his sunday best he will smile nicely at the camera :)

Yes Praise the Lord little Jere is standing!
However as you can see his right foot is a little bent inwards so he cant really stand. The foot bent inwards is actually a result of the imbalance of nerves due to the open neural tube defect where some nerves never developed or were affected. Try standing with your foot bent.... i tried and it really hurts. So before you start complaining how unfair life's been to you, look at this little fella who gives his best and tries so hard to get on his feet.
Let's all unite in prayer that God will strengthen little jeremiah hips down and straighten the little feet and get him standing nice and proper :) AMEN!

Praise the Lord!!!!

Our dear helper Ros who absolutely adores our dear little one Jeremiah and cares for him while i work called and excitedly tells me

"Jere can stand! Jere can stand! He pulls himself up from the sofa!!!!"

even for a split second.... that's great news for us!

Now! is that good news or what??? Of coz that's good news! Praise the Lord! Alleluia!!!!!

Jere is now 13 and half months and yeah, most kids would be walking at this age and if some of you still do not know, most drs kinda pin the fate down for spina bifida children saying these children either never walk or walk with walking aids.
Jere is crawling as a form of transportation still.... doubles up when he thinks you are coming after him and Well, for me, i believe with God, faith and love all around, Jere's gonna do things that people never ever achieved! He's not just gonna walk, he's gonna run, skip jump and dance for the Lord! AMEN!

i can do all things through God who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13)

How's Jeremiah?

Still sounds phlegmy and congested, but he's active and all over the place.

Now crawling (the commando crawl) is his main form of transportation. we try to make the floor very much a way of his life so he can cover enough "mileage" soon and move to the next step we call creeping (crawling the quadruped way).

Praise the Lord for these milestones and we pray that his flu will just leave him soon.

Micturating Cystogram (MCU in short) - postponed

Jere had a little runny nose since saturday evening and so i called kkh to postpone the test as i did not wanna subject him to any risk of infection since he was having a flu and his resistance could be low.
Postponed.... to when??? till he gets better then we call to get another date.
so now, we just pray that jere's nose will get better soon, in Jesus' name we pray. AMEN.

Micturating Cystogram (MCU in short)

One year ago, last year Aug 1, Tues Jere had this test....
Micturating Cystogram (MCU in short)
This was what I was told. A fine tube will be put through the urethra (the hole thru which urine is passed) with a special solution running slowly thru the fine tube into the bladder. x rays films are taken by the radiologist during and after the procedure. i remember i was crying throughout the procedure as Jere screamed and cried coz it certainly was not as easy as it sounded. Poor baby was strapped into a weird "space craft" and the machine turned turned turned.... certainly scary to the baby.

About 1 year later tomorrow, Jere will be doing this test again to assess progress.
Pray for Jere to be filled with the Lord's peace as he goes through this tomorrow and me too as i hold him down and comfort him.

I'm back I'm back

Yes, we're back!
will post more soon! learnt so much last week :)
thanks be to God!

The Special Mother

jus to share
last week i was at a seminar for what to do with your brain injured child and during the seminar lectures, this letter was read and it brought tears to my eyes so i came back and did a search and
i got this from the net
http://www.our-kids.org/Archives/Special_mother.html
enjoy.

The Special Mother

by Erma Bombeck



Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit.

This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."

Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."

"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has her own world. She has to make her live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you." God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect - she has just enough selfishness." The angel gasps - "selfishness? is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word'". She will never consider a "step" ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle, and will know it!"

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side".

"And what about her Patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid-air.

God smiles, "A mirror will suffice."

Missing In Action

If you find us as above...
it's because, I am crashing 2 weeks work in one coz i need to attend the week long seminar of "what to do with your brain injured child" and much as i like to post lotsa stuff, i really can't afford the time...
and yes, i finally got the confirmation again! Thank you Lord!
so u guys juz keep praying for us k! for jere's well being and of coz for me attending the seminar.

Love,
Mich

Flashback - Birth till discharge

before you freak out and wondering what happened again??? this is a post of the past that i had to write up to submit to the institutes to apply for a seminar so i thought i post it here as well. so this is what happened last year in 2006

Right after I birthed Jere, the neo natalogist Dr Simon Ng was called into the delivery suite to examine him, briefly told us about Jere's birth condition and had Jere wheeled straight into the Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) I was not allowed to breastfeed him Baby J was scheduled for operation at 1600 hr to cover up the spine. Then at about 9 plus that morning, it was the first time we met Dr Choo Su May, the anaesthetist for the op later. Was given the greenlight to feed till 1330hr.

Baby Jeremiah had a smooth operation 5th July, 2006, yes the first day of his life to cover up the open neural tube defect and was on morphine till 5am, 6th July, the following day. At first Jere was laid prone to rest but due to the bouts of apnea (stop breathing)he was flipped over from prone to supine (on the back) hoping that there won't be any more such episodes. The doctors told us that breathing was slow. He had a plastic box over his head which they explained was the oxygen tank and MRI and blood count and other tests were ordered for him.
We were told that Jere had no Babinski reflex ( that is the doctor's term of running a key or tickling the soles of the foot and the toes should curl up). He seemed to have no feeling. There was also little or no anus puckering when the dr stimulated him near his bum. He also pee only when the nurses did bladder compression.
The doctor explained that this means his motor movement of his legs and feet, his bowel and urinary movement are all affected.

On the 7th July the results were all out. Blood count ok MRI scan shows chiari malformation type 2, syringomyelia and myelomeningocele and an absense of corpus callosum(the bunch of nerves that communicates between the right and left brain) and mild hydrocephalus (water accumulating in the head) is seen. There is also more than normal water in the spine, supposedly due to the syringomyelia.
Good news is later that evening, no more episodes of stop breathing and he was allowed to take 5ml of ebm every 3 hourly. The doctor was monitoring his liquid intake as there is more than normal amount of water in his head and spine.
On the 8th July, 3 days post op, the nurses said he had slight jaundice and had to be put under the light. Other than that, his recovery from his op was uneventful.

On the 9th July, Jere stepped down. His condition was more stabilised and they moved his bed. There are different classes. The class he is in now is more stable kind... without the oxygen tank and what nots...though still in neo natal intensive care unit (NICU).

2006 12th July Jerry is done with his antibiotics. Plug taken off. Doctors are monitoring him for another two to three days about what I have mentioned before, water system in head, spine and suspect of leakage at his operation wound site.
2006 13th July In the morning we were told there seemed swelling at the operation site. Neuro surgeon is monitoring for leakage. Doc says there is water that just wont drain off. Usually it should go into the blood stream but seems like it's not happening. The swell and bulge could also be due to water leaking coz there was not enough tissue to cover when the op was done as bb jerry was only less than a day old then.
Afternoon about 1600hr, the neuro surgeon Dr Tang called to say that he had to schedule Jerry in for an op to repair the leakage at 1900. We pushed him into the operating theatre at 1915. At 2215, Jerry finally was pushed up. Dr Tang said no problem and explained he had put in artificial tissue and glue and Jerry would be put on antibiotics for next 7 days and be observed.
2006 14th July Baby J was still in the warmer and a little fretful so paracetemol was given.

2006 15th July Dr Tang called to say that fontanelle is soft but head circumference is 35 cm and to continue monitoring. He is on drip by the foot as his hands swelled. Looking hungry but not allowed more milk as they are monitoring the liquid

2006 16th July Dr Tang called to say the fontanelle is sometimes tense and bulge at the operation wound and explained that could be due to the water up in the head and to KIV a CT scan tomorrow. Other than that the wound looks alright and no fever.
2006 17th July Dr Tang said could hold the CT scan. Jerry’s head circumference increased to 37 cm from 35.5 and Dr Koh say that it's obvious there is water. Scan results is out. Dr Tang says does not warrant a surgery yet. Praise God.
Now monitoring head circumference. if it stays that way, Dr say will let it be. Dr also says pray for the op wound to heal nice as it shows a little bulge. on a positive note, so far lab tests for bacteria is negative which is good news.
Praise the Lord. Jerry's now weighin 3.8kg from his 3.37kg at birth on the 5th july.
He smiles when we talk about him or talk to him. His wound seems a little bulging now according to Dr. May be fluid inside....
2006 19th July Jerry condition is stable. Head circumference remained constant. Praise the Lord! Today last day of antibiotics. To be under observation for next three days. Please pray for no complication and infection so jerry can come home this weekend. He is two weeks old today. no news from doctors = good news i would say.

2006 20th July Done with antibiotics. Plug will be removed today. will be given bcg and hep vaccination. Please pray against all complication and infection so that jerry will be discharged soon. As his spina bifida's condition may affect from his waist down, tomorrow jerry will be doing an ultrasound on his kidneys.
2006 21st July baby Jeremiah Liauw is discharged back home after two ops and sixteen days in Neo natal intensive care.

2006 24th July It's been a little madness as we try to maintain the cleanliness of his op wound as it's so near to the buttocks that when bb jerry poos, sometimes it gets to the wound. And though the dressing is supposed to be water proof, it somehow seeps in. then it's crazy for us as we try to take the dressing out and change the new one. It’s so painful for jerry and so painful for us to see as well. We use an 8 by 5 dressing for the op wound so that is about how big the wound is. God please grant jerry complete healing.

This wed 26th, jerry is due to be checked by the pediatrician.
Thurs 27th, we got a referral letter to be seen by the pediatric surgical dept in kkh
Fri 28th, jerry is due to remove his stitches of his operation. Please pray against leakage and all complications.

So far, what I know of jerry's case is it's myelomeningocele ( the more serious case of spina bifida), syringomyelia (related to Chiari Malformation) and chiari malformation type II.
Also, there is absense of corpus callosum which worries me as i read that it's the nerves that communicates between the right and left brain.
As for his no control over his bladder and bowel movement, please continue praying. It’s probably caused by syringomyelia which is something like a cyst growing on the cervical cord. In Jerry's case, his MRI scan shows syringomyelia in the lower cervical cord extending along the entire length of the cord. This syringomyelia also cause the obstruction in the normal flow of cerebospinal fluid (CSF) thus, we hear of fluid in the spine as well as the head (hydocephalus)

Please continue to pray for Jeremiah Liauw
2006 27th July Yesterday went to kkh.
Did urine culture and urine analysis tests. Results not out. It was so hard trying to catch his urine as he was laid down and we just waited and of coz he was not comfortable so he cried throughout.
appointments were given for several other tests of which all are intrusive



2006 28th July Baby Jerry went to remove stitches today.
Really stressful for bb, dr, nurse and mummy.
Mummy went with bb J.
He was not sedated or anything, just some lotion applied before removing the stitches.
He was crying throughout.
finally doc removed some and said to return on mon (31/ to remove the rest.

What’s lined up for Jerry?

Aug 1, Tues - Micturating Cystogram (MCU) A fine tube will be put through the urethra (the hole thru which urine is passed) with a special solution running slowly thru the fine tube into the bladder. x rays films are taken by the radiologist durin and after the procedure.

Aug 8, following Tues - Urodynamics (UDS) a cold liquid is used to clean the part where pee comes out from (penis) then some numbing gel will be applied then a small tube will be inserted into the bladder and another small tube that goes in through the anus. it will be monitored for about 15 min then the child is to pee out.

Aug 21 Mon - Nuclear Medicine Treatment (DMSA) a nuclear medicine (radioactive agent) or (radiopharmaceutical = a chemical compound that contains a small and safe amount of radio active substance with a very short half-life which means they cease to be radioactive within a day) is injected into the vein of the child. Images are then taken either immediately or within the next few hours. the child will be positioned on a special detector called a gamma camera which picks up signals from the radiopharmaceuticals the child received.

all the above are tests from the urologists as spina bifida cases tend to affect waist down so they need to find out how well is the bladders, kidneys, etc.

Please pray for BB Jerry.
I know it's gonna be painful coz my dad been through those with the tube inserted thru the penis and anus. my dad has a high threshold of pain such that he can do a colonscope without being sedated or taking any pain relief but he was screaming through out the procedure where they insert the tube in his penis and anus even after taking panadol and the so called numbing gel.
Please pray for positively good results

then bb jerry will return to doc and get further blood tests.

Please continue to pray for bb Jerry and us as in our family. This really needs so much strength and I tell myself everyday I will not be beaten! I will not fall and I won't fail my God, jerry and of coz all that are behind me which includes all of u. Thank u again.

Uh oh!

Just got an email from the Glenn Doman Institutes that they have not received my detailed report as it seems and though they did confirm me thru email, i am not confirmed until they received the requested information and i had a phone interview with them. so I just sent them again. Pray they get it this time.

The best thing that ever happened to me....

....is having my two wonderful boys! REALLY!

when i am tired and they smile at me.... everything's ok

when i am shouting for help and there's nobody else around and nat comes.

when nat apologises when he was a little exasperated with me for calling him ten thousand times to fetch this and that for me while i washed jere.

thank you Lord for these wonderful blessings in my life.

Watch it KorKor.... I'm coming!!!!

 

Check this out!!!

Our little friend Jeremiah is growing fast and going fast too at his big bro Nat's food!
watch it! i am coming....
I used a little bolster to kinda prop him up as he tries to crawl and the food in front that his big bro is having definitely is a great motivation for him to move forward.
yes. do keep jere in prayers that the little one will crawl walk, skip and run :)

Yippee!!!!

Mummy... me have been accepted for the "What to do with your brain injured child?" seminar! After all the application writing of essay and sending of pictures and reports... FINALLY ACCEPTED. Praise the Lord! I really hope that this course is gonna help me to take Jere to greater heights with his development!

Flashback - Labour and Delivery

In case you're wondering why I am writing about the past, this is because I gotta submit a detailed description of pregnancy, labour and delivery to apply for the "what to do about your brain injured child" seminar.
so here goes...

Labour and Delivery

2006 Jul 4 Had mild contractions from morning. Not regular. Still can walk.

6 plus in the evening Contractions more close and uncomfortable. Informed sister to standby to take care of the older preschooler brother, Nat.

7 plus in the evening Sister and brother in law came to pick nat up.

8 plus, almost 9 Left home for the hospital.

9.15pm Reached hospital. Admitted and was sent straight to delivery suite. Changed into gown and was monitored for contractions.

10 plus pm Midwife checked for dilation. 5 cm! Enema given. Gynae was activated. Overheard from the nurses that the gynae asked the nurses to put a drip for me and to burst my waterbag but I refused. All natural, I said.

11.20 pm Gynae Dr Goh came in and burst my water bag. Said baby head high up and told me high risk and said must put life line otherwise later hard to find vein. I refused. Dr Goh seemed exasperated trying to convince me. He left the suite asking me to think about it. Dear hubby Tim and I discussed and we prayed as I was not comfortable about being poked at all.

11.45 pm Could feel baby moving. Contractions got really stronger. Asked for gas.

2006 Jul 5
Midnight Super painful. Midwife checked and said already 8-9cm and called for the gynae.
0045 Jeremiah aka Jerry was born weighing in at 3.37kg, 51 cm in length and a head circumference of 34 cm
au naturale birth :) juz like what i had for nat, my first born almost the same process .... admitted hospital around the same time and birthing somewhere past midnight. This time even better than nat in the sense that i had no pethidine injection at the thigh and feeling bruised thereafter and it was an unassisted birth as in no forceps or vaccuum was used. Praise the Lord!

Neo natologist was called in to check on Jerry and we were told that Jerry had a condition of Spina Bifida and he was wheeled straight into the Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit

The story continues at Jeremiah trackback section. http://amothersjourneyinfaith.blogspot.com/search/label/Jeremiah%20Trackback

Flashback - Pregnancy

FLASHBACK FLASHBACK FLASHBACK

It's strange how I am forced to dig out my diary and document it all down. Had to do this for the upcoming seminar that I have registered to secure my place.

Here it goes

Pregnancy
2005 Oct 28 Tested positive on HCG test. (Gave the test kit in a anniversary card to dear hubby Tim. Boy! you guys should have caught his face! It was our 4th year traditional wedding anniversary)

2005 Oct 29 Saw the gynae Dr Goh but could not see anything with the abdominal scan. Turned down an internal scan.

2005 Nov 5 Saw pregnancy sac with abdominal scan this time at gynae’s. Dr Goh said implantation ok. To return in 3 weeks.

2005 Nov 18 Saw the gynae Dr Goh earlier by 1 week as my car got banged by another in the carpark as I was inching out of my lot. Dr Goh did a scan and cleared everything and to monitor next 3 days. No negative signs. Asked to return next week to monitor.

2005 Nov 26 Saw Dr Goh. Everything seems ok. Gained a total of 1.4kg at 8 week 5 day gestation. Had been having loose stools and bloat.

2005 Nov 27 Temper’s very bad. Still very bloated and very loose stools.

2005 Nov 28 Consulted family physician, Dr Hing and was prescribed rest, loperamide for diarrhea, Buscopan for pain, Meteorspasml for wind and cramp. Called the gynae Dr Goh to check if medication was ok. Was advised not to take meteorspasml. Took the rest of the medication and slept all day. Cramps still persisted.

2005 Nov 29 Called the gynae Dr Goh again to check but gynae outstation.

2005 Nov 30 Consulted another Gynae Dr Paul Tseng. Was prescribed Losec and 3 days medical leave but I had my misgivings about the medication so did not take the medication and just rested.

2005 Dec 1 Still gassy and bloated but did not take Medication.

2005 Dec 2 Still feeling as bloated.

2005 Dec 17 At 11weeks 1 day gestation, a total weight gain of 1.2kg. Foetus measuring 4.6cm.

2006 Jan 7 At 14 weeks 1 day gestation, a total weight gain of 2 kg. Foetus measuring 8.4cm.

2006 Feb 4 At 18 weeks 1 day gestation, a total weight gain of 5 kg. Foetus measuring 13.2cm.
2006 Mar 4 At 22 weeks gestation, a total weight gain of 7.3kg for mummy and baby estimated weight to be 495g. Blood test results were out. Dr Goh said it’s all ok. Did not proceed to do detailed scan as Dr Goh said it was optional and not necessary since we were young, should be fine.

2006 Apr 9 At 30 weeks gestation, a total weight gain of 11kg for mummy and baby estimated weight to be 1.5kg

2006 May 20 At 33 weeks gestation, a total weight gain of 13.7kg for mummy and baby estimated weight to be 2.5kg. Blood pressure at routine check up with gynae shows ok. However, Dr said sugar level a little high, maybe due to the little more ice cream I have consumed. Gained too much weight, almost 3 kg in 3 weeks. Blood volume also low so was advised to take iron tabs.
2006 Jun 1 Routine check up with gynae. Lost 1.9 kg in 2 weeks with a nett weight gain of 11.8kg for mummy. Baby estimated weight at 2.6kg.

2006 Jun 16 Routine check up with gynae. Total weight gain of 13.5kg for mummy. Baby estimated weight at 2.8 - 2.9kg.

2006 Jun 23 Routine check up with gynae. Total weight gain of 13.4kg for mummy. No more scanning of baby. Heartbeat ok.

2006 Jun 30 Routine check with gynae. Total weight gain of 13.5kg for mummy. No more scanning of baby. Heartbeat ok.

well, if i have not answered your question, no, the problem that jerry has was not diagnosed prenatally.

Flu-ey

Fever's gone by Fri evening but little Jere's nose seemed a little runny...
through sat and sunday.
He was sleeping still when i left the house this morning.
Pray that the flu leaves and the coughs that seemed to be coming wont make its way here... AMEN!

Jeremiah's Birthday

What did we do?

On the 5th when Jeremiah turned 1.....

Tim and I made an effort to go home before he sleep but instead ended up as usual around 7 plus 8. We quickly finished our dinner,took out all his pressies and the cake left from our family gathering last sunday, stuck a candle in and sang a song. He was still running a slight temperature of 37.7 so we juz gave him a little cake before giving him his paracetemol and putting him to bed.

Thank You Lord for this day, for giving us this little precious baby. Lord we pray that you watch over little Jeremiah and lay your healing hands upon him and restore him to perfect health. This we pray in Jesus name. Amen.

Jeremiah's 1 today!

Exactly 1 year ago, many of you had expected our sms to announce the arrival of our bundle of joy. Indeed the sms came along announcing the birth or our little Jeremiah and asking desperately for your prayers as Jeremiah fought on in the Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit. He was a special baby born with a congenital defect spina bifida myelomeningocele in other words, also known as open neural tube defect exactly 1 year ago. He stopped breathing on us so many times after his operation right on the 1st day of birth in the Neo Natal Intensive Care Unit and survived thanks be to God and to the many angels He sent around praying, rallying behind us and blessing us in many ways.

Yeah! Jeremiah turns 1 today!!! Praise the Lord!!!
Today we celebrate Jere’s first birthday as we shout for joy and look back how far we have come! We are so privileged to have been entrusted little Jeremiah and to be called to walk with Jeremiah this journey. It had been a LONG journey. We give thanks to God for all His blessings amidst all the chaos, for showing us the springs in the wilderness, the rivers in the desert and also blessing us with all the angels around. Yes, we do not know what's gonna happen and what lies ahead but we choose to believe that God has plans for Jeremiah. Plans to prosper and not to destroy. God will restore Jeremiah to perfect health.

The more steps we take, the more comfortable this walk will become, and the more confident we will be of the destination of our walk. As we walk this journey, we have learnt to give thanks in all situations, to count the many blessings and to let Him lead. And ultimately that's what faith is all about. It is "the assurance of things hoped for"

Nothing is impossible and we can do all things through God who strengthens us.

Today Jeremiah is a healthy and happy 1 year old. Praise God! Other than his hips down being weaker and falling behind his peers in motor development and the so called bigger head that has more water than it should have, Jeremiah is a happy and healthy boy wonderfully made! He is alert, active and eager to live J, full of smiles and laughter. When he smiles, he smiles with all his heart and body. His muscle tone imbalance in his hips down due to his open neural tube defect means that he works so hard to crawl every little distance as he pulls with his arms in his commando crawl. He will walk, run and dance for the Lord. Our little hero, our warrior, our fighter! His determination is and will always be a source of inspiration and pride for us.


Thank you all for your wonderful support, prayers and blessings to Jeremiah and our family this past one year.

Please continue to lift Jeremiah up in your prayers for complete healing especially for his issues in the head, namely hydrocephalus, syringoemyelia, chiari malformation ii and his nerves that has been affected in the open neural tube defect to be restored especially hips down, his neurogenic bladder (displacement of urine), anus puckering (bowel movement) and motor development and sensation in his legs.

Thank you all once again. Thank you for being here and there for us people! Words can't express our gratitude. God bless.



Love,
Mich, Tim and Nat

Fever :(

At 4 plus this morning, somehow felt jere was a little hot. Asked tim to get the thermometer and indeed he was running a temperature of 38.5
quickly administered nurofen and sponge him, and searched high and low for the water cushion to let him sleep on. By the time i return to bed for a little more shut eye, it was already six plus and nearly time to get nat ready for school. anyhow, i got some shut eye till 7 and jumped up.

please pray that the fever gets banned away soon as the little one is turning one officially tomorrow.

What To Do About Your Brain-Injured Child

I applied for the What To Do About Your Brain-Injured Child Course scheduled for July 23 to 27, 2007 in Singapore by the IAHP and i think the institutes tried to call me for a phone interview at 11pm last night when i was putting the kids to bed and missed their call. coz they are at philadelphia, thus our time difference :( i think they are exactly 12 hours behind us.

Anyway, i also received an email from them requesting for a detailed description of Jeremiah's development from birth to the present time, including information about the pregnancy, labor, and delivery and this description must be in parent's own words.

Stress!!!! lemme pray before i start....

it's trackback time for not just jere but me too.... pregnancy, labour and delivery....
so for those of you who always wondered....
stay tuned :)

Hope

in the darkest hour.....

that's the message i concluded from a strangest dream i had last night.

The dream....
I dreamt we were in some war or something and were all captured and made to march. There was so much fear in us....
As we march, i caught a glimpse of the back of the gal who was marching in front of me. She had a scar on her spine like that of Jere and so i had to ask her, telling her i was curious coz my son had it too. She then shared that she too had spina bifida but look at her she's ok now. she's marching, walking, running like any normal person and she even told me she had twice as much the strength she used to have even marching in this thing.

usually, i wake up from my dream not being able to piece things together but this dream felt so real.

and so i concluded that we are all just caught up in this really dark and fallen world but there's hope within if only we believe.

Thank you Lord for my faith.

A Call to Minister

We were invited by Henreeta to a session on the 16th June at Novena church meant for the communion ministers.
Our whole family went and brought my dad along.
I went coz i always thought though i am not yet in any ministry, God has given me Jeremiah so that i can minister to others.
Tim always thought he is in the "father" and "husband" ministry which is no easy feat to him, he said :P
Father Augustine was there with another priest Father Verghese.
This was what we heard for the evening...

A psalm of David, when he was in the wilderness of Judah.
Psalms 63:1
O God, you are my God-- for you I long! For you my body yearns; for you my soul thirsts, Like a land parched, lifeless, and without water.
So I look to you in the sanctuary to see your power and glory.
1. invoking God
2. Intellectual level, in the mind
3. Personal attachment -- you are my God

My God knows my needs, satisfies my needs and You know me through and through. You know my strengths, my weaknesses
My soul thirsts for you - the love that I have for you, that I experience from you
I do this with joy for You where I minister, it is Your sanctuary. So we have to sanctify ourselves so that we can be empowered to minister. What we are doing are for the greater glory of God.

Luke 9:1
He summoned the Twelve and gave them power and authority over all demons and to cure diseases, and he sent them to proclaim the kingdom of God and to heal (the sick).

Mark 3:13-15
He went up the mountain and summoned those whom he wanted and they came to him.
He appointed twelve (whom he also named apostles) that they might be with him and he might send them forth to preach and to have authority to drive out demons

We are a fallen race but we are lifted up in the hands of Jesus. Those whom He wanted are those whom He loved and that's us! We are fallen but never NEVER ABANDONED

C
He's got the whole world in His hands.
G7
He's got the whole world in His hands.
C
He's got the whole world in His hands.
G7 C
He's got the whole world in His hands.


He's got the wind and the rain...
He's got you and me brother (sister)...
He's got the tiny little baby...

Joshua 3:1-5
Early the next morning, Joshua moved with all the Israelites from Shittim to the Jordan, where they lodged before crossing over.
2
Three days later the officers went through the camp
3
and issued these instructions to the people: "When you see the ark of the covenant of the LORD, your God, which the levitical priests will carry, you must also break camp and follow it,
4
that you may know the way to take, for you have not gone over this road before. But let there be a space of two thousand cubits between you and the ark. Do not come nearer to it."
5
Joshua also said to the people, "Sanctify yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will perform wonders among you."

the 3 days is like a triduum... the triduum that we always have before a feast day
the levitical priests is like our ministry carrying the ark of the covenant, the ministry entrusted by God.
we have to sanctify ourselves today for the Lord will work wonders for us.
In serving, in ministering, we have to have the grace.
Father jokingly said, we human beings should have the labels as on glassware or petroleum
"HUMAN BEING - HANDLE WITH CARE. FRAGILE. HIGHLY INFLAMMABLE"
jus look how easily we snap and flare up at others... How true is this :P

7
Then the LORD said to Joshua, "Today I will begin to exalt you in the sight of all Israel, that they may know I am with you, as I was with Moses.

the above said is a confirmation of the power given.
and so with the power of faith, absolute faith, they crossed the river of Jordan.

Therefore we trust that God will be with us, empower us and sanctify us and counsel us.

Exodus 15:26
"If you really listen to the voice of the LORD, your God," he told them, "and do what is right in his eyes: if you heed his commandments and keep all his precepts, I will not afflict you with any of the diseases with which I afflicted the Egyptians; for I, the LORD, am your healer."

I Am The God That Healeth
F Am
I AM THE GOD THAT HEALETH THEE
Gm7 Bb/C Bb/F F C/E Dm
I AM THE LORD YOUR HEAL--ER
Gm
I SENT MY WORD AND HEALED YOUR DISEASE
Gm7/C C7 Gm/F F Csus C
I AM THE LORD YOUR HEAL--ER

F Am
YOU ARE THE GOD THAT HEALETH ME
Gm7 Bb/C Bb/F F C/E Dm
YOU ARE THE LORD MY HEAL--ER
Gm
YOU SENT YOUR WORD AND HEALED MY DISEASE
Gm7/C C7 Gm/F F Csus C
YOU ARE THE LORD MY HEAL--ER

We were told that there was a Praise and Worship session at the Church of the Holy Spirit on the 20th June at 7.30pm. For sure we will go :)

2nd Neurologist Assessment - June 2007

It went well! Praise the Lord!

Well....maybe she had more time this time,
Maybe we were her last patient and she wasn't rushing for a lunch appointment this time,
Maybe she had a feedback from one of the other neurologist who is in private practice but a visiting consultant at kkh that we consulted in mid June.
Maybe somebody else complained :P coz the last time when i was turned away, another was also turned away behind us.
maybe maybe so many maybes.....

most importantly i pray that God have touched her heart and yes let's believe it was that :)
you guys must have prayed for us for a good assessment. Thank you angels :)

Yes, we had the same doc that kinda turned us out some 3 months ago cos she was rushing for her lunch appointment. She was so much nicer this time. She spent a good whole 15-20 min with us.
I would say she did a much better job this time in testing Jere and Thank God for that coz i was telling myself before i went in that if she's gonna have the same attitude like the last time, i would complain and request for a change of doctor.

She kinda tested Jere's reflexes and legs holding them pushing them and said
"This guy's gonna be a crawler!"
PRAISE THE LORD!!!!
Yes! Jere will crawl and walk and run and dance for the Lord! Amen! Alleluia! Praise the Lord! Thank you Lord!
She gave Jere a small cube to hold, i think she was trying to test his pincer grip. Of coz Jere can do that coz he practises with the raisins that he always wanna put in his mouth :)
She even carried Jere for a brief moment, put him on her lap and sang London Bridge is falling down, mentioning that that's her son's favourite.
I asked her how is Jere globally and she said Jere is fine in all areas except his motor development that is falling behind his peers. We praise and thank God for blessing Jere in cognitive, hands and all great development and continue to pray for his motor development in his legs.

We went down to the physiotherapist after to see if we could get a smaller left side dennis brown for Jere but no... they did not have any so i thought big better than small so we will just make do.

We called the children's ah ta (paternal grandfather) to see if he could fetch them back home but he was kinda still sleeping . He probably drove his cab till late last night as it was already past 1pm.
So i put nat and ros and jere up the shuttle bus back to novena station where they got an mrt back home to amk :) saved my cab fare for them. Nat was excited to take the shuttle bus :P i was a little worried though.... wondering if ros could cope but i had to rush back to work as i escaped during my lunch time.

Thank you Lord for paving our way and making it a good one today :)

To top it all, it was even a better day as i was leaving the hospital to catch a train back to the office, the clinic assistants who were coming back from their lunch saw me and so warmly spoke to me asking if all ok, going home? and even offered me the fruits that they have brought back from lunch. They really offered! as in opening the bags and insist i take a piece! I was really touched by their warmth :)

Thank you Lord for being in all these people :)God bless their hearts

2nd Neurologist appointment

@1150hr kkh.

Please pray for a good session, assessment.

God speed.

A Friend's Prayer

This was Laura's prayer for me and my family last night via sms

I pray Lord that Michele will have restful uninterrupted sleep tonight.
Take all her cares away and send your angels to watch over Tim, Nat, Jere and Ros.
Renew her so that when the sun rises tomorrow
when she sees all Your creation around her, she will feel joy
that You are a powerful God
and everything that is happening is in Your control.
Bless the family and keep them safe.
Amen.

and indeed we had a good peaceful night's rest.
i really had an uninterrupted sleep last night. it's been so long. i woke up so refreshed and charged.
Thank you Lord. Thank you for my friend Laura. God Bless her heart!

How God speaks

and yes He speaks....

He knows I am down and He sends His angels to minister to me...

these are the comforting and encouraging words that I received via sms from Laura

Michele, U r doing the best in ur circumstances.
U have been brave for so long.
There is no doubt to God or ur family n frens that u have taken up ur cross so obediently never giving up.
Don't be so hard on urself.
Mothering is by trial and error
and you are doing your best learning hoping deciding praying.
I read a website of a mom with a special child.
She said her son is a joy to the family and loves God
(Jere can say Amen so cutely right?)
In man's eyes, Jere may not be considered well but in God's eyes he may be perfect coz God looks at the heart.
You can do all things thru Him who gives u strength!
Your reward is in heaven.
Our time on earth is a short time compared to eternity in heaven.
God bless.

after reading the message, I teared.
Lord I know you are walking this with me and all things are possible thru You Lord.
Thank you for speaking to me.
Thank you for your angels on earth.
Thank you Laura.
Thank you all you friends that journey with me.

God Knows

Yes, He knows when I am feeling down.

I have my moments too....

As it comes to almost a year since Jere was born and everyone asking me if there's gonna be a celebration or not, the memory of the pain when Jere was born, how he went into surgery and all the fear almost a year ago gripped me! It felt so tight, so suffocating. Suddenly i felt so so down, thinking that I have not done enough for this little life that I've given birth. Looking at how fast the time flies and how little i have accomplished with him suddenly saddened me. There seems so much to do for Jere but so little time. Is it because I am working that I can't accomplish as much??? but if i don't work, how are we gonna cope with the bills? Can tim sustain???

I cried and cried at healing mass last saturday. I felt so suffocated by all that is happening. Work, family, and all the crazy rush to the hospitals for all the checks, the mri scans, the ultrasounds.... and more tests coming up that I've pushed till after Jere's first birthday

What's bothering me? i really don't know....

Counting, more than ten friends had babies the same year that Jere was born. All of them have more or less hit all the milestones. The milestones set by humans. Everytime someone sees us, they would ask... can he crawl? Is he cruising? Can he walk? We never ever thought such a simple question could cause so much hurt in a mother. Never. And yes, YES it's hurting inside everytime someone asks. Why can't humans just see what they can see and appreciate what they can see?

Why can't doctors and nurses use kinder words? I was trying to be nice when I saw this nurse in kkh who had used kinda nasty tones at us before when I saw her while wandering around kkh waiting for our turn at physio last Saturday. I said Good morning while this is how she greeted me "Still haven do ah?"(the clean intermittent catheterization she means) She did not even return the Good morning. How sad for these people. In 2 days' time, we've got an appointment with the neurologist at kkh who turned us away when I knocked on her door some 3 months ago. She said she's gotta rush for a lunch appointment. We had waited for more than an hour for our turn after 3 months of waiting for the appointment to have Jere assessed globally and when it was finally our turn, Jere was fast asleep. She said not to wake him and just asked me questions like is he babbling? is he sitting? crawling? and sent us out. Jere woke the minute we stepped out of her office so i knocked to ask her to assess him and she said she was rushing for a lunch appointment and walked right past us and off she went. Frankly, I don't look forward to seeing her at all and she's supposedly active in the organisation club rainbow. She certainly didn't seem compassionate to me at all.
The urologist is supposed to get back to me on the report of the last ultrasound as she promised but it's been how long since the ultrasound, i have not heard from her. She had told us that she would be going on a school trip with her daugther and she might be missing in action for a while. We saw her after the report was out the day the ultrasound was done. The report showed thickened bladder walls but no numerical values attached to it and I have asked her about it as the previous ultrasound showed thickened bladder walls but had a numerical value of 4mm. All she had to say was, you gotta do something... cathetherization or some punching of hole on the bladder or even circumsicion. Wait a minute, cant we do a comparison of the ultrasounds properly first before we make any decision???? Well, maybe the bladder walls are thickened but it could be lesser than the previous time? Shouldn't there be a numerical value or something to compare? otherwise how do we even plot a graph and assess what's the progress? then what's the purpose of doing all these scans???

maybe..... maybe all these pent up frustrations is just driving me a little mad....

i just need to surrender them to the Lord.
Lord, make me a channel of your peace.
this jus reminds me of the prayer of St Francis.
We just need to give of ourselves to meet the needs of others for it is in giving that we receive. that as we give of ourselves, we receive the peace and blessing of our risen Lord Jesus. It is our sins that block our claim on the eternal life. Lord, help me to forgive these people that hurt me. help me to let go Lord. I know deep down inside i still kinda can't forgive the gynae that saw me thru my pregnancy and delivered Jere. Just felt that he did not inform us enough of the tests that we should have taken and that aside, after the delivery, he was hardly compassionate about the whole thing. He even charge me a hundred plus for the post natal check. ok. maybe he was trying to be professional. but somehow he just gave me a feeling like he's kinda afraid we gonna pick up charges against him or something. straight after i delivered, he dragged tim aside and asked him, you didn't do the test???? tim was like what test?? did you even tell us??? all that i can remember is he always said.... it's ok la, you all are still young, just do the normal test will do la... the optional ones can skip.... and when things happen....???? Lord help me to see the goodness of it and let go.
Lord, grant me the peace, the consolation, the hope, the light and the joy in all these situations now Lord.

Make me a channel of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me bring your love.
Where there is injury, your Pardon, Lord,
and where there's doubt, true faith in you.

Make me a channel of your peace.
Where ther's despair in life, let me bring hope.
Where there is darkness, only light,
and where there's sadness ever joy.

O Master, grant that I may never seek
so much to be consoled as to console,
to be understood as to understand,
to be loved, as to love, with all my soul.

Make me a channel of your peace.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.
In giving of ourselves that we receive,
and in dying that we're born to eternal life.

The Bill

arrived in the mail last week. The bill for Jere's last MRI scan came up to almost 1.4k in cash after subsidy and medisave deduction. Gosh! is that expensive or what? and we are talking about Jere being already in C class, that is the lowest class there is and not even staying overnight at the hospital and the bill can come up to this....so much for public medical....

Sometimes they should do a case to case basis. All the write up about special needs children in the papers but no mention about spina bifida children. I really think the awareness should be raised here.

Second pair of Dennis Brown shoes

Yes, we are blessed once again, with another pair of hand-me-down Dennis Brown shoes. This time without the base plates and the screws. Thank you Lord. The physio therapist Ghim Hui was really nice. She got us another pair and said she'll look out for us for the next pair too. She said Jere will probably need this shoes for a very long time till at least 6 years old and I retorted :P well, there could be a miracle! and she smiled :)

Yes, people. Let's unite in prayer and pray that the Lord would lay His healing hands upon Jeremiah and straighten his right foot and strengthen his hips down legs feet and all that soon he need no Dennis Brown shoes anymore.

Dennis Brown Shoes - Part 2

Gosh this post is like 3 months overdue!

I said I had to post part 2 about these Dennis Brown Shoes till today I am gonna get the second pair and I still have not gotten it done!

That day when we went to get the shoes, in my heart I was still thinking to get or not to get... so EXPENSIVE! $155 per pair.

Then while we were speaking to the therapist, I was ranting of how much we have spent and how costly these shoes were. Aren't there any rental? or you know pre loved ones that are still good? like you know you can get those adidas, nike off the yahoo auction....

Then the therapist smiled and walked out of the room. She returned with this huge screwdriver and a pair of the shoes. The shoes had some metal plate screwed below which the therapist said Jere did not need and if we could unscrew that plate off, the shoes were ours to keep. So Tim who was there went.. ok... no matter what i gonna yank that plate out! He tried and he tried but in vain... anyhow, we left the place thanking the therapist assuring her we'll find a way. And so we got the shoes FREE! Thank You Lord! Look how the Lord watches over us and blesses us!

We went home and Tim took out all his tools in his tool box and tried and tried but still could not get the darn plate out of the shoe. He was trying for the rest of the afternoon and night till he went to bed.
That's how much your daddy loves you Jere.

The next day, Tim was on leave, for what really i can't recall but i definitely remember how he was still trying to get the metal base plate off the shoe. He went to the bicycle shop after sending me to work and asked them if they could help. They tried but in vain. Tim went to another hardware shop asking for help but they too could not unscrew the plate. Tim then returned to the bicycle shop and the people there almost thought he was crazy. I guess no one really understands how only a parent could feel and want to do what they can do for their child who is so helpless in the situation. Tim then went for lunch still thinking of the Dennis Brown over his bowl of Lor Mee at the market nearby. When he told me what was going through his mind, i was really touched at his love for little Jere. People all celebrate a mother's love but i guess we should celebrate how great our father's love is too! He told me that the whole world can don't unscrew the shoes but he has to do it coz he will be able to do it coz he's the father! and so he quickly finished his noodles and returned to the bicycle shop. The people looked at him with unbelieving eyes and he just humbly asked if he could borrow their machines to do it. The boss agreed. So Tim went in and tried his hand at it. The boss soon joined him looking at how determined he was. Together they finally yanked the plate off and Jere wore the shoes for a good 2 months :)
Thank you Daddy....

Okie, later during lunch i gonna zoom down to the hospital to get a new pair for Jere after waiting for a month for the appointment since he outgrown those shoes. I pray that the Lord God watches over us and send His blessings upon us wherever we go.
Pray that i get another Hand Me Down :) but without the metal base plate this time or at least one that is not screwed so tightly :P

Praise the Lord Alleluia

*click for better view*
Jere raising his hands in praise to His Lord that healeth him :)
I'm not kidding! this is what he does when you say "Praise the Lord Alleluia!"
The pictures above were taken 22nd April 2007

In exactly a month

Jeremiah will be ONE!
How time flies!

Everyone's been asking me to put a wish list so they won't end up buying stuff that would seem useless to us. Thank you Lord that all your wonderful angels on earth wanna contribute to the progress of Jeremiah in some way or another.

But right now, really, i can think of nothing but prayers prayers and more prayers. So those of you who have been praying, keep praying. And those of you who don't pray, maybe can start now. NO... not kidding... start now :P of coz if u don't mind, we'll be most glad :)

Actually, God has been granting so many things to us already even before i put up the list. I had wanted to get my hands on lotsa Glenn Doman stuff which God has sent many to us in His own ways. Thanks Belinda for the Glenn Doman stuff and making most of the stuff gifts and so affordable to us.

Will put a wish list up soon. I try. I promise :)

till then, keep Jeremiah in your prayers.

Healing Masses

I am getting so addicted to these healing masses and I think it's a good addiction ;)It just somehow rejuvenates me and recharges me so wonderfully.
Plus you should see how Jere raises his hands in Praise and Worship and how he tries to sing :D
I remember my helper Ros asked me if she wasn't sick should she go and receive the healing and this was what i told her. Well, you don't need to be sick or have someone sick to attend such a service.In my opinion, everyone needs healing in some form or another. Today she's ever so ready to go to the healing masses. She says she always return home feeling so light so charged.
well, the next one will be

16th May 2007
3rd Sat Mass with Healing Service
Church of St Michael
Fr Michael Arro
Rosary session 6.45pm
Praise & Worship 7.30pm
Mass with healing session 8.00pm

and if you are afraid of being alone, just gimme a shout :)

June's Medical Calendar

Jun 06 - 1155 @ KKH Specialist Clinic P Orthopaedic Dr Arjandas review. Paed Surg dept referred us as Dr Y thought Jere's toes were clawed and she kinda freaked out when she saw how Jere had bitten his toes without feeling it.

Jun 08 - 1330 to see therapist at Rehab for a new fitting of the DENNIS BROWN SHOES. Yikes! i'm not exactly looking forward to buying that expensive shoes and letting Jere wearing them again. Jere had been free from them since he outgrew them. Yes! expensive! it cost $155 per pair for the small size ones and the prices goes up with the size! *faint*

Jun 16 - 0830 Physiotherapy Session with Satyaki @ kkh.

Jun 21 - 1150 Specialist Clinic P with Dr J W

Please pray for Jere's hips down to be strengthened and his legs to be straightened and strengthened. Also Jeremiah's bladder walls to normalise and protection of his kidneys to be good and growing well. Amen.

Bitter or Better?

I was talking to dad this morning. Called him to ask him how was his medical check up. Realised he was a little depressed as he said the doctors told him not too good news like his urine colour is no good=infection and he may need another op was the urologist's opinion but the surgeon that has operated on him, how many times? i lost count advises no unless it is a life or death situation.

So i shared with dad.

Frankly, the doctors that see Jere also hardly ever had anything good to say especially the paed surgeon or is she the urologist? If she ever had anything good to say, she'll put it in a really dark way.... like "YOU ARE VERY LUCKY HIS KIDNEYS ARE STILL INTACT!" so i tell myself take it which way positively and thank the Lord Jere's kidneys are intact and be HAPPY and praise HIM! or be bitter about how the dr put it and brood about it thinking why should they not be intact??? of coz i choose the former and keep trusting in Him. A friend asked "can the drs be more positive & encouraging??" jokingly i replied ... "no lor... these doctors all come from ONE KINDA SCHOOL.COLD MEDICAL SCHOOL." akin to the surgical instruments waiting in the cold operating theatre...DEVOID OF FEELINGS... just there to CUT... ok jokes aside... like in every trade, there's the good and the not too good... well, who am i to judge? I've met with GREAT WONDERFUL FEELING DOCTORS that i must say and one of those that i truly respect is the one that operated on Jere's first day of life and saved Jere's life. ok let's put it this way these doctors don't mean to cut... whether it's via their operating tools or the words from their mouth. Well, didn't all these doctors all started with a passion? A burning desire to save and help mankind? No? I'm sure they did. i guess more like it they've seen so much that they try not to have any emotional ties to any patient otherwise when something happens, it will upset them big time too. I'm sure they have feelings too. I'm sure they hurt as well when anything untoward happens to any of their patients. Though sometimes for my urologist... i don't know... i seem to think that maybe she's seen too many patients that she does not realise how much her words can impact people or she's just immuned to the terms? okok.. whatever... I thank God that He is always with me so i am not so much afraid, so to speak for I know He goes before me always and all I've to do is just to trust HIM and follow Him. Yeah... it's ok
all that's important is i know

My Lord loves me
and oh.. the wonders I see.
The rainbow shines in my window
My Lord loves me

and yes, my Lord loves me :) and Jere and you daddy.

This post is to remind myself who makes the decisions for little Jere and to you daddy that we just gotta trust in the Lord for He loves us and has plans for us. Plans to prosper. Not to destroy. Many a times, i would think we try to outsmart God don't we? We try to intervene in His plans. I think sometimes with all these modern technology and medicine, sometimes, well sometimes, i am not saying the modern technology and medicines did not save lives and of coz we gotta give it credit for the many lives saved but it sure took lotsa lives too especially with all the abortions that take place all the times. Did we even give these foetuses a chance?

Well, of coz modern technology has saved little Jere's life too right from the start and I thank God for it for i understood from the doctors that in the 70's babies born of this defect are just left to catch meningitis and die.

God bless all the souls of these babies that are born and return to the Lord due to some defect and of those aborted and take them all to heaven. AMEN.

Blessed Sunday

Two big celebrations in line today.
1. Jit and San's wedding
2. Eileen's Jeremy 1st birthday which reminds me to start working on my dear Jeremiah's birthday preparation.

It's a blessed blessed weekend with all the weddings and celebrations

We brought the whole gang to Jit and San's wedding at The Four Seasons. Nat is a big boy now sitting a seat by himself and enjoying all the food. He's been to so many weddings that i've lost count. All of Tim's friends are married now. On my side, there's still some....Jere was so attracted to Jeremy, Tim's friend, Cindy's hubby, ethan's daddy. I don't know it's Jeremy or his orange shirt but Jere kept flying to Jeremy to be carried. or maybe Jere knows they share the same name :)and Jeremy and Cindy also have been constantly praying for jere since his birth.

After all the weddings, it's all the baby showers and birthday parties....

It's the second wedding lunch that Jere attended. We dressed him in a little Polo Ralph shirt and jeans handed down from nat's time but he sure looked so so cute that Ros called him "MY LITTLE SIR". The first wedding that Jere attended was of coz his fairly oddparents (oops! i mean fairy godparents.... occupational hazard la... there's this programme Fairly Oddparents in the channel i work... haha) Karen and Chris where Korkor Nat was the ring bearer :) Karen and Chris, we hardly ever see them coz they are in Aussie but Nat and Jere is always in their hearts, minds and prayers :) We are planning... yes we are planning... but no blueprint in sight :P to go up and bunk in with Karen and Chris before they move back here. This will also depend if the Yee yee (my sis) and Yee Cheong (Bro in Law) will go too... then we will use Tim's mileage from flying to redeem some air tickets, hopefully...hhmmmm do i smell a holiday in sight? Frankly, we are a little burnt out but juz gotta hang in there :) Maybe we should start with the church retreat :)
Anyway, i brought Jere porridge and fed him some during the first dish. After that he was a little restless so i brought him out and Ros put him to his nap. He slept for a whole good two hours and woke when we finished our lunch. How timely :) He woke to stare at the gorgeous bride and say bye to all of Tim's friends.

We then headed home for a quick shower and fed Jere his dinner and antibiotics before we headed for Jeremy's 1st birthday party at one of the ECs at Yishun. Thank goodness it was nearby but anyhow Nat was so tired that he slept on the way there. Sure no joke when you got kids and adults programme all lined up for the day. Tim was kinda grumpy as he was tired. The kids enjoyed the birthday party... esp Nat of coz as he is already at that age where he can really appreciate blowing of candles, balloons and friends. Jere on the other hand kept screaming for the fried rice that i was having when i let him have a taste of some. Jere knows Godma now and always want Godma to carry. Nat went home with 4 BIG balloons that Morgan, Jeremy's daddy gave believing that if he held the balloons all nicely together, he could just fly up to the sky like Mary Poppins and her umbrella.

Thank you Lord for the many blessings on us all.

Our crazy Saturday

Started with morning physiotherapy with S at KKH. Jere was in an ok mood this time. Usually he cries throughout the sessions and this is the 3rd time only we are doing physio at KKH. See how far apart our appointments are. This time he was trying to pull the hair off the arms of the physiotherapist :P He's an Indian and quite hairy. Thank goodness he was really patient and nice :P

After that, the boys went to kopitiam to have a bite while i made a run to the step down childrens unit to visit little Zoe who's coming 6 months and had a heart surgery last week. She was looking good. Praise God. I carried her and fed her her milk. She's such an angel.

Then we rushed to the 11am novena. After which Tim dropped me at Hyatt to attend Avril's wedding while he brought the boys home for their lunch and a short rest before heading for healing mass at Immaculate Heart of Mary (IHM) at 3pm.

I rushed down to IHM to meet them for the mass. After that there was a reception and Jere enjoyed the band playing for the elderly who attended the healing mass. Jere was happy clapping his hands to the music and the aunties all passed Jere all around.

While i was at the tea reception following the healing mass, thoughts came back to me of being there a year ago when i was pregnant with Jere. Then i thought.... it could have been worst.... and I thank God for blessing Jere and keeping Jere protected.

People were wondering why Jere was wearing a name tag as only those were to be annointed had name tags. Most of them were the elderly and Jere was just a little baby. I had to explain to some but i guess that's how God's name is to be praised :)

Basically, we were there coz the aunties at IHM visited Dad to give him holy communion weekly. The aunties then gotta know Jere and his condition and thus asked us to bring him along to be annointed.

Towards the end when everyone was leaving, i was talking to one of the aunties when we saw someone pushing a really old lady towards us. I thought the lady was coming to the aunty i was speaking to but the lady was actually pushed up to come and hold jere and kiss jere. how sweet yeah? She was so frail... she could not even push her own wheelchair. someone else wheeled her over. she came over and went, "BABY...." No wonder my dad always says... you can be a billionaire but you can't buy a sweet little smile from a little child :) it's priceless. Jere smiled at the lady and she was sure very happy :) before she left.

Jere is such a blessed child. Thank you Lord for all your blessings.
The familiar words of the hymn just comes to mind....

Count your blessings, name them one by one,
Count your blessings, see what God hath done!
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord hath done.

Results of the ultrasound

Yes, Thank you all for keeping Jeremiah protected with your prayers.
The ultrasound shows the kidneys are growing fine. Praise the Lord! Thank you God!

Dr Y seems to find it hard to believe and keep telling me how lucky we are but i think the fact is we are blessed, protected and kept by our good Lord!

This time, the report also shows thickening of the bladder but there is no numerical values attached to it. The last ultrasound 25th Jan showed the bladder walls measured 4mm in thickness. I asked Dr Y to find out the thickness so at least we will know what trend is it going. Well, it could be 3mm or 2mm or even 1mm right?

Lord, please normalise the bladder walls.

And of coz again, dear Dr Y asks to do Clean Intermittent Catheter (CIC) some i dunno what vasectomy????... some punching of hole to release the urine which all i disagree coz the word itself is intrusive invasive and the dunno what ....tomy is irreversible! why i wanna do such??? and also CIRCUMCISION! ok this i may consider for the hygiene and what not purpose. but i think i may delay coz he's had too much GA for this year....

Let's unite in prayer and pray that the Lord continue to heal Jere and keep and protect Jere. that the nerves affected in the open neural tube defect be restored and his bladder functions bowel movement and his sensation hips down and legs and all will be restored to perfect health! Amen!